Call Me
by HavasuWhiskey
Summary: God knows she'd tried. Regardless of what she was told, she would love him the same. But it didn't change her choices.


_**Authors Note: It brings me much joy and thanks that all the readers enjoyed that little snippet. I cannot deny feeling a tad rusty as I wrote it and even as I wrote this piece. But, the feeling of appreciation for the warm and kind 'Welcome Back' reviews is ever present. Thank you, and I hope you enjoy this snippet as well.**_

This is what it came down to. What everything in her life came down to. A suitcase packed full of necessary clothes and tools; a purse minimally stuffed with pictures that would remind her of hr choices and of better times. She could be characterized as a gypsy with the way she lived. Never staying in one place too long, for fear of attachment, fear of commitment. Her homes were rented, cars put on leases and switched out ever so often. But not this time; this place she had stayed the longest. Had taken a deep breath for the first time and willed herself to stay longer. Because of him.

She enjoyed the way he could interact with anyone he came across; how instantly he was adored. Nothing she ever heard was bad when his name was attached. Even though she had tried, she found that she was no exception. There wasn't a shitty thing she could say about him; which only proved to make her choice in this particular matter more difficult. Though she'd tried many times to change her ways, promising over and over, it was always never minded. She couldn't handle it; and when they called her the worst for leaving, she still loved them. When he pulled back from her with a look of desolation in his eyes, she still walked away smiling. Because that was _her._

She was his favorite, she knew. She knew he'd hurt for awhile, sulk and then be angry and take it out on those around him. But she'd convinced herself and him that it was what was best. After all, he was the first to leave. To make the decision to leave. She wasn't going to stick around and feel sorry for herself in the lonely structure of her rented home. No, she'd busy herself with what truly made her happy. Work. Being in a dirt hole clear past her head, with string mapping and brushes with gentle bristles. Sweat coming down her brow, down her back and soaking her shirt.

It was quick to make her choice. And to this day she'll say it wasn't her choice to make. Without an explanation of whose choice it truly was. All of it was easy to put together. Nothing lasted forever. No matter what he said to her, from the beginning to the middle, it was false. Nothing ever lasted forever because forever didn't exist. People ran away, died; cars crashed or burnt out; buildings crumbled from wear and tear. So when he told her she was leaving she added it to her checklist of proof.

There were so many things she wanted to scream at him, that no matter what he said to her, called her, she still loved him. But all she could say was 'okay', and 'be safe'. And she was on her way. By the time she had reached her apartment and the fury was wasted during her packing, all she could think of was how she wished she'd told him to call her. Send her on her lonesome way with a brief promise that she'd hear his voice again. It was a dear friend she was losing anyway. But no such things were exchanged and now there was only could have, should have. And those she didn't believe in. But she believed in him. Oh how she believed in him.

The clock screamed at her that two hours remained before he was up in the sky, out of reach permanently. Even if she sped she'd still have an extra hour to reach him. Spin him around, register the look of surprise on his face before she wrapped her arms around his torso. She could convince him to stay, if she tried hard enough. But knew that if the position was reversed, he wouldn't be able to convince her. Maybe though. He always said there was a first time for everything. And though she didn't believe fully in it, the pang in her chest registered at the thought, and he would call that hope.

But that's not how things worked, how she worked; how any of this worked. That over stuffed suitcase was zipped shut, and that boarding pass and passport were tucked safely and neatly into a pocket of her purse. Her apartment keys were placed gently on the front desk and she was loaded into a cab. The first stops of her trip to a faraway destination completed.


End file.
